Hiya!

OK, first of all, writing "hiya!" just made me think of Miss Piggy saying "HI-YA!" and reminded me just how frickin' excited I am to see the new Muppet movie. I was hoping we'd get to see it this weekend but my DH is getting a little stressed about work, so it's going to have to wait a bit. Sigh...Kermie...

Second -- Marybeth -- I'm so glad to see your comment because I was worried about what had happened! Keep me posted when you can -- you can e-mail me through my profile.

Let's see. I didn't mean for a week and a half to go by since my last post. But, last week was crazy at school and then we've had this week off and have been traveling (new city every night) since Monday and there's never been reliable internet service and as much as I love my new iPhone, it sucks to try to post on it... Or comment on blogs -- sorry that I've not been that great about it lately. Trying to catch up!

So, anyway, here's a summary of everything that's been going on.

It was SO weird to be visiting friends these last few days because we were visiting people who actually KNOW what's going on. So, for the first time since I've been pregnant, I got to actually DISCUSS the pregnancy and IVF. I won't lie, it freaked me out a lot. I would find myself in the middle of a conversation and then start thinking "yeah, but this is going to feel stupid if it all ends next week."

I wish I could get out of that mindset. I keep saying to myself "this will be a successful pregnancy. There's no reason why it shouldn't be."

Then we were at my SIL's house for Thanksgiving where she and my BIL know but my DH's parents/their partners don't know. Luckily, after Thanksgiving lunch, EVERYONE is sleepy so it didn't look weird that I couldn't keep my eyes open... (My DH has decided to wait as long as possible to tell his parents. At one point he said something about 20 weeks... I hope he's joking because I'm trying to imagine being pregnant with twins at 20 weeks and trying to hide it from his mother.)

Yesterday, my DH and I wandered around a closed car lot and checked out minivans and SUVs. Talk about bringing on a bit of a panic... I SO want to get a big ol' family car but I'm really afraid to jump the gun.

(I have GOT to get out of this mindset.)

Yesterday, my cousin's wife had her triplets -- she was only about 27 weeks. They'd had her on hospital rest for at least the last two months and were hoping to keep them in until 32 weeks, but it didn't happen. Everything is looking good so far, but this is so early (they are all around 2 pounds or less) and it is so scary. Please send lots of positive thoughts their way. They've got a long way to go, yet.

Today I went to urgent care because I've been feeling like I had a UTI for the last several days and it keeps getting worse. I did an at-home test and it was inconclusive. Well, the test at the clinic said all is fine -- although they are sending it off for culture just to make sure. Basically, I just can't tell anymore if my uterus is hurting or if it is my bladder. So, I thought I'd rather get it checked out than find out that an infection was slowly making its way up to my kidneys. Still hurting a lot. But, I guess it's all to be expected. Everything is just very sore. The doctor offered me an u/s today, but I turned it down. The scan wouldn't have told us anything useful that we could actually DO, and my next RE scan is Tuesday. And, I think I really didn't want the scan because, if there is bad news, I just want a few more days of believing.

So, a lot of this post seems like I'm feeling down about the pregnancy. I'm not, really. It's just that this next scan will be "the one" that tells us if the same thing that happened last time has happened again. Last time, we didn't find out about the miscarriage until 11.5 weeks, but the baby probably died around 7.5 weeks. So, now the scan on Tuesday is at 10 weeks -- and our last scan was at 7.5 weeks. It's this "unknown zone" that scares me. I just want to make it past this milestone. Then, of course, I'm sure I'll say the same about 12 weeks, and 14 weeks and 20 weeks and etc., etc. But, after this one it will all at least be different from the last time. I need that difference. If it wasn't for the bleeding, I think I'd be in a better place with it (who am I kidding, probably not).

So, there you are. Long rambling post. How surprising, right? Never would expect it from me, right? :)

Anyway, for all in the US, I hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving. For all around the world, I hope you're having a wonderful Friday.