I'm in LA for my friend's wedding. Having a great time. Thursday night we went out for some somewhat subdued bacheloretting. I bought out the glow-jewelery section of the party store so we were all draped with glowing necklaces, etc. And tiaras. And flashing things. And bridal top hats. It was really fun. We kind of felt like 12 year olds on a drunken tear. Hmm, that just sounds wrong! Anyway, you know what is lovely? Gin and tonic. You know what is hilarious? Watching the bride's mother and maid-of-honor attempt to make a glow penis out of glow necklaces after drinking some gin and tonics.
You know what's really yummy? Never ending margaritas at the rehearsal dinner. They just kept coming... I *think* I only had two... But the waiter emptied the pitcher into my glass every time he took away a nearly empty one so it was probably more...
I've had WAY too much to drink since I've been here (and planning to have more at the actual wedding tonight...). But, it's helping me feel better about the fact that I wasn't supposed to be able to drink at this wedding, so that's just what is going to happen!
I realized the other day that I feel "normal" again. I guess I hadn't realized how different being pregnant made me feel overall. Suddenly I was at work and I realized I felt normal. It was weird. And, I'm feeling anxious to start trying again. All of which I think is a good thing. I feel worried that, now that we got pregnant without "help", I'm going to expect it to happen instantaneously again. It's almost like I'm back to the naive person I was two years ago when we were just getting started. I'm trying to get that idea out of my head so I'm not too disappointed. I'm just so afraid it is going to take another 20 months.
I also have to admit that I'm terrified my friend will get pregnant before I do again. They're going to start trying in a few months and I don't know how I will handle it if it happens quickly for them and I'm still trying... again. At the same time, I desperately want it to happen quickly for them. I wouldn't wish this IF hell on anyone and my friend is a few years older than I am. Every day I want to yell at her "what are you thinking waiting a few months??? You should have been off the pill 6 months ago and started trying three months ago!!" When she said that she hadn'tH really started taking pre-natals regularly, I just wanted to shove some down her throat. Sigh... When you know too much.
Which, I think, is why alcohol has just been so very tasty this weekend...
Do you ever look back at that naive self and miss her? I do....
ReplyDeleteIt sounds you have a perfect weekend going in LA. Enjoy every moment of it, you deserve to have fun!!!
ReplyDeleteAbout your thoughts of trying again, I understand you, Twinnie. It scares the heck out of me, too. I don't know what to expect, and I don't know how to prepare myself, and for what, really? so I can totally relate to what you are saying.
Well, I hope you won't need to think about this for long, because you will be successful in no time. Do you guys have a plan for how to move on with TTC? will you try on your own for a while?
My fingers are always crossed for you, Twinnie!
So happy you've had a fun and drunken weekend away! That sounds like so much fun...and margaritas can be very theraputic =)
ReplyDeleteI know TTC again is full of all kinds of mixed emotions. I'm hoping it happens very quickly and easily for you!
I'm so glad that you're enjoying your time in LA!! I'm especially glad you're feeling back to 'normal'....
ReplyDeleteWhat are the plans for TTC? You know I'm sending you all the good luck I can!
Rock it out this weekend!!!! Have fun and live it up!
ReplyDeleteEveryone is behind you when you decide to try again.
Good for you! Enjoy yourself. And glow necklaces and drinks sounds like fun.
ReplyDeleteI say drink up and enjoy yourself girl! It sounds like you are having a freakin' blast -- good for you!!!!
ReplyDeleteGood for you, Rebecca! It sounds like you are having an amazing time. Keep enjoying yourself. You deserve it.
ReplyDeleteSounds like a super fun wedding and I'm glad you're getting to enjoy it! :)
ReplyDeleteGlowing penises, gin & tonics, and bottomless margaritas? Sounds like just the weekend you needed. And, hey, getting pregnant again without intervention wouldn't be a bizarre occurrence.
ReplyDeleteDrinking at an event that you weren't supposed to be able to drink at--it's like the universal therapy for IF, I think.
ReplyDeleteSounds like you had fun!
Yes! So glad you had FUN! I love weddings and I especially love being able to drink and let loose. I am happy to read that you are starting to feel "normal" again, whatever normal is....
ReplyDeleteSounds like blast! I hope you had even more fun at the wedding!
ReplyDeleteCongratulations on feeling normal! What an accomplishment - seriously! And I'm glad you had a nice drunken weekend - you deserve it.
ReplyDeleteIsn't it amazing how quickly we go from miscarriage to wanting to TTC again? I was amazed at how quickly I got back to that place, and it makes me feel better to see that you're there too. So what's the plan?
I had a similarly alcohol induced weekend with friends... sometimes it does the body good :)
ReplyDeleteI hope you can get back on the TTC train really soon. I understand the feelings of anxiousness (is that even a word?) after a miscarriage. Been there many times ...